Dance is more than a passion for Graysen Redburn, 18, of St. James; it is the soul’s unspoken language. 

“What keeps me coming back is the feeling of accomplishment and not just accomplishment in awards or how good I am,” she said. “It’s about being productive, being able to be creative, and make things and use my brain differently than an everyday task would ask of you.”

Since the age of two, Redburn has dabbled primarily in ballet, tap, contemporary, lyrical and jazz dance. She said ballet is usually the starting point for learning dance, which gives each dancer strength, flexibility and balance. 

After learning ballet, Redburn said she learned jazz, which is “a sharper kind of dance” that is “upbeat and fun and you get to show your energy and expression.” 

Lyrical dance, rather, is slower, and tap is more playful with rhymes and beats. While contemporary, Redburn’s favorite type of dance, is more expressive and emotional. 

“I feel like Graysen loves dance because it's a space where she can fully be herself without fear of judgment or expectation,” said Ashley Redburn, Graysen’s mother. “She can forget everything else that is happening and only focus on the music and the feeling of the movement. I think dance is so deeply woven into the young woman she has become that I'm not sure you can separate what it's given her versus who she would be without it. When I see her dance, it's as if I'm watching every version of herself from age two to 18, all at the same time.” 

One aspect of dance that Redburn acknowledged she had to master over time was listening to her body. Knowing one’s limit is important for injury prevention, sustaining wellness, health longevity, optimizing effectiveness and overall performance. 

“I definitely pushed myself, but learning your body and knowing when to quit is the most important. Not quit as in the sport, but when to give yourself a break and focus on healing,” Redburn explained. “I have found that preparation is definitely the most important for me. If I have a competition weekend coming up, I spend the week eating good protein and resting my muscles and icing and heating, and I go to the chiropractor almost twice a week consistently. Preparation and learning what your specific body needs and what is and isn't good is definitely  a learned thing, but so important.”

Ever since the age of seven, Redburn has done four competitions each year and has won multiple first-place and judge’s choice awards. One of her biggest inspirations is her mother, who has been a dancer and teaches dance to this day. 

To date, Redburn’s favorite performance is one she choreographed herself.

“Last year, I was fortunate enough to be able to choreograph my own solo to take with me to competition,” she said. “Usually you have a choreographer do it, but I was able to choreograph my own, so that is definitely my most proud performance. I spent all the time and effort creating it, learning it, putting it on my body, putting it on stage, and then it did really well in competition.”

The performance was set to eerie music, and the tone of the dance, according to Redburn, was about domineering and manipulative human behaviors. In essence, she said the performance was symbolic of people controlling others and that the controlled person learning how to ultimately regain freedom. 

“It was really where my head was at,” she said. “What people tell you to do and what everybody else is doing. Falling into the normal of society. Breaking out of it and realizing this is not who I want to be, this is not what I want to do. Finding your own place on your own terms.” 

As much as Redburn loves dance and it is part of every fiber of her being, she had to make her toughest decision to date — to pursue professional dance or not. It was a grueling choice, she said. 

On one hand, she had the talent, drive, and determination. On the other hand, there was the physical sacrifice and the exhaustion. 

“Ultimately, what made me make the decision was physical,” Redburn noted. “Physically, my body is so broken down. I have struggled with chronic pain for three years now, maybe more. I don't have any cartilage left in my knees. I shredded every muscle in my back two years ago, and I am still recovering from that. In the end, I just decided that it wasn't worth altering my physical future. There was a massive part of me that wanted to just follow in my mom's footsteps directly cause she danced all growing up, went to college for it, and is now a teacher. I think when it comes down to it, I can still have dance in my life without having to break down my body more.”

For now, Redburn will continue to dance locally and will start cosmetology school in January in Rolla. She holds out hope that one day she can open her own dance studio. For future dancers, Redburn said appreciating the true art of dance opens your eyes to a world of possibility. 

“You really have to learn to love the art,” Redburn said. “So many dancers focus so much on the competitive aspect of it or the fun aspect of it, but getting to be creative and getting to feel emotion through movement is going to take you so far.”